I stopped by the care facility to see my
female patient after having communicated with my Agape supervisor about updates
for a couple of days.I had been out of town for a couple months.
Her husband was there when I arrived and
she was in bed, unresponsive, with an oxygen mask.
Once again, her husband seemed to have
some anxiety about the process, worrying out loud about things like the fact
that she hadn’t eaten anything in several days and that she was not responsive
to people.
I did my best to chat with him about
how in my experience, every death is different, each follows its own course,
and that his wife and her body were doing what they needed to do. I assured him
that she did look comfortable and also said the process will unfold on its own
time and there was no way to say for sure when she would take her last breath.
Overall, her husband seemed grateful that
I came to visit. He read me a couple of Bible passages that he found
encouraging about death. I sat very briefly with the patient herself, held her
hand lightly and said hello and I could see she was doing what she needed to
do. I told her how much I had enjoyed spending time with her and said, again,
that I would read about Merle, the freethinking Dog, and remember our journey—Merle, the patient,
me—together.
I was surprised when I realized how long
I’d been seeing this patient. We started with
Bible reading and that was great, but once we proceeded to “Merle’s Door, Lessons from a Freethinking Dog,” we
had something that just the two of us shared.
Agape Volunteer, Clay Bonnyman Evans
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