Sunset Threshold Choir: Can You Sing?

Agape has a partnership with Moon Over Mountains (MOM) Threshold Choir in Boulder.  Over the past couple of years, they have provided their beautiful lyrical presence, song and tone at the bedside of many of our Boulder-area patients.  I am now THRILLED to announce the launch of a new threshold choir that will rehearse in Arvada and expand our bedside singing capability beyond Boulder.  

Kaelin Kelly, Agape volunteer and MOM threshold choir member, has been working to develop and lead Sunset Threshold Choir.  Kaelin is ready to hear from prospective choir members. Learn more and get in touch: Sunset Threshold Choir on Facebook.

This is such an amazing gift to offer our patients and families during their dying process and I am deeply grateful to Moon Over Mountains Threshold Choir for continuing their mission – as well as to Kaelin for her commitment to building Sunset Threshold Choir.  

I will keep you posted on when the choir will be ready to begin to offer their song in this expanded area.  

-Beth

Got Your Back

Consider hospice care: A team of providers steps into people’s lives at one of the most sensitive and complex times. Like other providers, they answer questions, educate and provide medical care and support. At Agape, there’s also an element of personal investment.

Agape’s vision has staff ensuring a “meaningful end-of-life journey” for those we serve. We take it to heart, and we are all in.

 

We've celebrated many significant Agape anniversaries: docs, nurses, CNAs, social workers, chaplains and support staff who have been with Agape anywhere from five to 12 years.

There are reasons. For many, hospice work is a calling. As a small, private provider, Agape feels more like family than a healthcare business. There’s another factor: team support.

Emails come across every day with words of help, encouragement and recognition of a job well done. There’s road and weather conditions (like RN Nici’s Denver traffic report or Director Kelly’s weather admonitions: Be safe. We need you.). The Agape team jumps in for one another, meeting pressing needs: “Don’t worry. I’ve got it.”

Hospice work is hard. It's also immeasurably rewarding. End-of-life care takes grit and an open heart. What helps is what we express to our patients and families: The journey is better with support by your side. 

"Match.com" Approach Enhances Patient-Volunteer Connection

When Volunteer Manager Beth Kelley tells people what she does for a living, they typically assume her work is sad, even dreadful. She's quick to say the opposite is true: Every day, she gets to witness people connecting at a sacred time in life. 

Beth came to Agape six years ago, after 20 years in corporate HR. She enjoyed her work but wanted to know at the end of each day that she was making a difference in people's lives. In her current role, she does HR for unpaid employees, her team of hospice volunteers.

Agape volunteers are a unique part of the care team. They don't show up with a blood pressure cuff or a list of diagnostic questions. Instead, volunteers are present with patients (and family) in ways that are most beneficial.

How do they know what people need? For one, Agape volunteers receive special training on end-of-life issues and how to be present and open with people in the last season. Beth also has engineered a method for connecting volunteers and patients using a "Match.com" model. She writes a profile for each patient, allowing volunteers to choose match-ups based on common interests or traits. These have included:

• Jazz
• Southern Roots
• Chocolate Ice Cream
• Schnauzers (and all kind of breeds!)
• Military Service
• Grandchildren 
• Love of music, poetry, art, travel and more. 

Beth calls her volunteers "extraordinary beings" because they knowingly sign up to form a relationship with people who likely won't be here in the next six or so months. And, knowing the loss will cause them sadness, they are willing to do it over and over again.

Self-Care: Not Self-ish

March is National Social Worker Month and an ideal time to connect with our inner social workers. (It's also a great time to give a social worker a hug, gift, or recognition for the stellar work they do to make our world a better place.)   

People in healthcare professions pour themselves out as they serve patients and family. No matter what our jobs, life has a way of asking us to show up  and bring it every day. One of our volunteers, Lee King, compiled a handout on the subject of self-care. It starts with the following quote:

Self-care is not selfish. You can't serve from an empty vessel. 

This month, we're focusing on some ways to care for ourselves. Some of us are already good at this. The rest of us will need some practice. Regardless, here's a good place to start:

Self-Care Tip #1: Acknowledge Yourself
Remember, it is not selfish to take care of yourself. Consider sitting on a plane before take-off. The flight attendant instructs anyone traveling with children to first put on his or her oxygen mask, and then the child's. We are better at caring for others when we are properly equipped.

You have wishes, dreams, hopes for each day. You also have needs and limits. Some people have been rolling on auto pilot for so long, they haven't listened to their inner social worker in years. In the spirit of the movie "Inside Out," wake up that inner social worker. While you're at it, give the dude (or lady) a name!

Take a pause, a few quiet minutes to be without thinking about anyone's expectations (including your own). Be aware of your breathing. Recognize how you're feeling in the moment. Think about what you may need: Is the way you're living honoring your physical, mental and emotional health?

Your thoughts and feelings are valid and worthy. So are you.

Note: Self-care isn't something you put on your to-do list. Nope, it starts right now.

Images of Agape

Since joining Agape Hospice last July, I’ve been asked a couple of times, “What the heck is Agape?” On occasion, I encounter a perplexed face, as in, “What did you say?” when I tell someone the name of our agency. 

As a former church pastor, I’m naively surprised by these responses. After all, I have personally explained agape from the pulpit in no uncertain terms. I was tested on its definition by professors in seminary years ago.

As I  think about it, it makes sense that most people are unfamiliar with agape. After all, it is a Greek term and not English. Although it is used many times in the Bible for selfless, unconditional love, it isn’t actually seen in print as agape. Rather, it is translated into English as just plain “love.” In reality, the concept behind this word demands thoughtful reflection. It’s an idea that really can’t be reduced to mere words; it can only be understood through action.

For many years, I thought I knew agape, but I didn’t really know it until I came to work in hospice. Now I encounter it every day. I see it in:

●     The CNA (Certified Nursing Assistant) gently combing a lady’s glistening silver hair.

●     A social worker holding the hand of a man who gasps for each breath of air.

●     A chaplain listening attentively to a young woman explaining her struggle with how to tell her teen that she won’t be there for milestone events, like hearing about her first kiss or celebrating her graduation from high school.

●     A volunteer sitting at the bedside of a dying man until the wee hours of the morning,  waiting for a family member to arrive, to ensure the patient doesn't die alone.

●     A nurse compassionately explaining to members of a family what to expect in their loved one’s final days.

I now understand agape to be a verb. My Agape teammates inspire me to be more selfless and caring, to embody what Agape is all about, and to awaken each day to the simple thought: “How might I agape today?”

Jeff Jenkins,  M.Div.

Chaplain

CoBANK Awards Generous Gift to the Agape Foundation

Agape had the honor of accepting a $5,000 check from CoBANK to the Agape Foundation. The check was presented by Agape volunteer and CoBANK employee Lee King this week at our all-staff meeting.

Lee received the check in combination with winning the CoBANK volunteer of the year award for 2015. We are grateful for this generous gift and what it will provide for patients and families in need.

As Volunteer Manager Beth Kelley said at the acceptance ceremony, Lee approaches her work as volunteer the way she approaches her life: Fully focused and dedicated to whatever she is doing. That means putting concerted effort into knowing each patient and family, what's important to them and how she can help make their days as meaningful as possible. Here's just one example:

Volunteer Lee King with Agape Owners,
Larry Woods and Kim West

When 97-year-old Trudy came onto Agape service, she asked if any of our volunteers hailed from Kentucky. Unfortunately, none of them did, but Lee King entered the scene and did the next best thing: She poured herself into learning about Kentucky, even finding a link to the town newspaper where Trudy used to live.

And Lee learned a whole lot about basketball. She said, "Basically, basketball in Kentucky is nothing short of religious. They love their basketball!"

This was true of Trudy. So Lee, armed with her new Kentucky knowledge, planned a special evening. She made Trudy's favorite foods (potroast, veggies and potatoes) and she, Trudy and Trudy's son gathered to watch the Kentucky Wildcats play Ole Miss.

The icing on the cake? Final score: Wildcats 80/Ole Miss 74.

We congratulate Lee for winning this honor. Humble thanks to Lee and CoBANK for the incredible support.

Patient name is pseudonym to protect privacy.